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Quotes
Here I'm going to have funny or insightful quotes.
Hope is wasted on the hopeless. Civilization is only skin deep. Sometimes you have to go threw the darkness to find the light. If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy? "Dream as if you'll live forever, The question may strain your sanity, but the answer will snap it in half. By definition, madness ends in one of two ways: clarity...or death. Your past is a map to where you will go. Darkness, hide my fear. The cautious are wary of their enemies. The wise are also wary of their friends. "Would you abandon your past to save your
future?" Fighting for the right reason is itself a source of strength. Show weakness to hide your strength. The truth will outshine all lies. Some minds are more open than others. I am as the wind that bears me: harsh yet gentle, fleeting yet ever-present. Together we fly beyond imagination. Stray not into the path of darkness, or be lost forever. The most complicated science is the human mind. -Karl You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you cant pick your friends nose. Money cant buy friends, but it can rent you some good ones. The hardest part of breaking up is getting back your stuff. -2gether If your the monster, nothing will be waiting in the shadows to jump out at you. Sex is like a card game, if you don't have a good partner, then you better have a good hand. Parachutes are for people who can't fly. More and more of our imports come from overseas... If you pull yourself away from opportunities just because of a few bad experiences, you'll never have any good ones.
* "You can tell
whether a man is clever by his answers. You can tell whether a man is wise by
his questions." Perhaps most people say their is no God simply because they would then have to stop and think that what they are doing may be wrong. * All that we see or seem, is but a dream within a dream Being single is like a vacuum cleaner: its sucks when you're turned on.* "Time travel will never be possible, because it isn't already." Is man one of God's blunders? Or is God one of man's blunders? I am lying. Everyone has something in common, they're all different. Vision without action is a daydream. Action without vision is a nightmare.
The cause of every war in the world can be traced back to one of four things: prejudice, land, belief and the British* Sometimes we have to risk the dark to see the light. All truths that are kept silent become poisonous. The best thing about the future is uncertainty. And I don't want the world to see me, cause I don't think that they'd
understand. When everything's made to be broken, I just want you to know who I
am. What's the point of living if you can't feel alive? Marriage is like living with your best friend, except he lets you touch his
boobs. "No matter where you go in the world, there never seems to be a shortage of
idiots" I'm a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I'm perfect.** "Wise men talk because they have something to say. Fools talk because they have to say something." -- Plato** "For those who understand no explanation is needed, ...For those who don't none will do". - Jerry Lewis** A nuclear war can ruin your whole day .** Why does caregiver and caretaker mean the same thing?** Resistance drains energy "Money can't buy happiness... But it sure makes misery easier to live with..."** "Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies."** "If you wish to live wisely, ignore sayings including this one."** "If something goes wrong... blame the guy who
can't speak English." "When the going gets tough, everyone leaves."** "Why are wise men, and wise guys the exact opposite?"** "The only thing standing between me and total
happiness is reality." "Reality? Is that where the pizza delivery guy comes from?"** "Minds are like parachutes — they only work well when opened."** People are like crayons, it’s not the color they are, but the picture they make.** "A game should be like a woman's skirt. Long enough to cover everything, but short enough to keep it interesting." "I do not know how World War III will be fought, but
World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones" "Here In The Dark Is No Light At
All Admittedly, there are a lot of things that are better than sex, and a lot more that are worse; but there's nothing quite like it...* Never forget that only dead fish swim with the stream. Without order nothing can exist - without chaos nothing can evolve.* There's no honorable way to kill, no gentle way to destroy. There is nothing good in war. Except its ending.* Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness. Beauty is only skin deep, and the world is full of thin
skinned people. If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver* Imagination is the one weapon in the war against
reality. It is impossible to defend perfectly against the attack of those who want to die.* Life is too important to take seriously. Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do
wrong. We don't live in the world of reality, we live in the
world of how we perceive reality. It often takes more courage to change ones opinion than
to keep it. Any sufficiently advanced technology is
indistinguishable from magic. Where there is love, there is pain. If God had intended Man to Smoke It's better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.* Philosophy is a game with objectives and no rules. The price of greatness is responsibility Education is very important. School, however, is another matter.* Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere
ignorance and conscientious stupidity. Ignorance is curable. Stupidity is not.* Never forget what a man says to you when he is angry. He who has imagination without learning has wings but no feet.* He who knows others is wise. He who knows himself is enlightened.* History does not repeat itself -- historians merely repeat each other.* I despise the pleasure of pleasing people whom I despise.* If you are not part of the cure, then you are part of the problem.* You can never loose while you're fighting. You only loose when you stop.* Never judge a book by its movie.* Never insult seven men when only packing a six-shooter* Hate is baggage, life's too short to be pissed off all
the time, its just not worth it. Fate is just what you call it when you don't know the
name of the person screwing you over. Doing stuff is over rated, look at Hitler. He did stuff but don't we all wish he would have stayed home and gotten high?* That's why its called a shortcut, if it was easy, it
would just be The Way. The Truth....A Strange Sort of Fiction 4 out of 5 voices in my head agree they don't like you. There are three kinds of people in this world, those who can count and those who can't. Oh, so I'm normal if I have good taste in music, but I'm crazy if I think music tastes good. <insert witty quote here> Understanding is a three-edged sword. Your side, their side and the
truth. The ability to speak does not make you intelligent. Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool? The joy I had has faded away These constant emotions are Philosophy is like.....life programming. The end is nigh There's a thin line between hell and heaven. Waste not want not Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. People are stupid plain and simple. What lies behind us and what lies ahead of us are
tiny matters compared to what lives within us. We always overestimate our worries and underestimate our potential.* Nothing is lost until you stop looking for it.* You laugh because I am different, but I laugh because you all are the same.* Invincible is merely a word to describe someone who
has nothing to lose. The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, but it is just as hard to mow.* People demand freedom of speech to make up for the
freedom of thought which they avoid. Yet do not cast all hope away. Tomorrow is unknown.* You can't fulfill your dreams if you don't wake up. You can't imagine what you're missing, when you're missing your imagination.* My goal is simple: the complete understanding of
the Universe. Everybody wants to be normal, but no one wants to be average.* The more I know about people, the more I wish I didn't know.* It is not what you do to live, but what you live to do.* Criticize a friend in private, praise him in
public. I never learned anything from anybody who agreed with me.* Confusion is the door that wisdom comes in through.* Suicide is a long term answer, to a short term
problem. The world is not an evil place because of those who
do evil, but rather because of those who sit back and let it happen. Only the wisest and the stupidest of men never
change. Those who speak don't know, and those who know
don't speak. Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not
absence of fear. I would rather be mad with the truth than sane with
lies. The more I learn, the less I know* Time you enjoy wasting is never wasted. Either write something worth reading, or do
something worth writing. Be smart, don't act smart.* Even if you don't have the answer, you certainly
have to admire the problem. You must be prepared to accept that the foundation
for all that you believe is not only possibly wrong, but probably wrong. Having a secret crush that you've never told is
painful, but to have that secret turn into "What Might Have Been" is a
life long torture. Integrity is not how you act when others are looking, but how you act when no one is around.* The distance between insanity and genius is measured only by success.* The average man thinks he isn't.* The truly powerful do not proclaim themselves, they are proclaimed by others.* Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one
thinks of changing himself. Tis better to reign in hell than to serve in heaven. All that you do, do with all of your might for things done by halves are never done right.* Prepare for the worse, hope for the best.* Don't take life too serious. You'll never escape it alive
anyway. Sometimes the hardest thing to let go of is the thing you never really had.* There are causes worth dying for, but none worth
killing for. Show me a man who has never failed, and I'll see a man who has never attempted anything.* Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he
never shows to anybody. The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet and
steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole
lifetime, if not asked to lend money. The old law of an eye for an eye leaves everyone blind.* Whenever you find you are on the side of the
majority, it is time to pause and reflect. Pizza is a lot like sex. When it's good, it's really good. When it's bad, it's still pretty good.* The lack of money is the root of all evil. Conserve energy -- make love more slowly* There are many humorous things in the world; among
them the white man's notion that he is less savage than the other savages. Never trouble trouble until trouble troubles you. The ultimate measure of a man is not where he
stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and
controversy. It's not having what you want, it's wanting what
you've got. We could learn a lot from crayons: some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, some have weird names, and most are different colors, but they all have to learn to live in the same box.* You see, fantasy is what people want, but reality
is what people need. If you fail to plan, you plan to fail* Cling to your imperfections; they're what make you unique.* It is OK to revisit the past. Just don't set up permanent residence.* Teaching is the profession that creates all others.* The world will not evolve past its current state of
crisis by using the same thinking that created the situation. Often people fall short, not because they have tried and failed, but because the fear of failure kept them from trying at all.* There is a fine line between fishing and just
standing on the shore like an idiot. I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am
a vegetarian because I hate plants. A great many people think they are thinking when
they are merely rearranging their prejudices. All racists who are prepared to die for their country, please do that now.* A penny saved is ridiculous.* Always remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else.* Booze is the answer. I don't remember the question.* In spite of all evidence to the contrary, the entire universe is composed of only two basic substances: Magic and bullshit.* God bless Atheism!* He who trains his tongue to quote the learned
sages, will be known far and wide as a smart ass. A witty saying proves nothing. If God had meant for us to be naked, we would have been born that way.* It is generally agreed that "Hello" is an
appropriate greeting because if you entered a room and said "Goodbye,"
it could confuse a lot of people. Never settle with words what you can accomplish with a flame thrower.* My life is like a porno-movie, without the sex* If you can not answer a man's argument, all it not
lost; you can still call him vile names. As she lay there dozing next to me, one voice
inside my head kept saying, "Relax... you are not the first doctor to sleep
with one of his patients, " but another kept reminding me, "Dick,
you are a veterinarian." Camouflage condoms: So they won't see you coming.* The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9
out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot. I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist
it. Of course you found it in the last place you looked. If you hadn't found it you'd still be looking* Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the
ground and miss. Why is "abbreviation" such a long word?* I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.* Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?* A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking.* Don't be so open-minded that your brains fall out.* Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.* Cure virginity! It's me and you against the world. So when do we
attack? If Darwin's theory of evolution was correct, cats
would be able to operate a can opener by now. On the other hand, you have different fingers. There are no stupid questions, just stupid people. If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten
lava, let them go, cause man, their gone. For nonconformist the world whips you with it's displeasure Nothing at last is sacred but the integrity of your own mind. Knowledge and skill overcome superstition and luck. Man who goes to sleep with itchy bottom wakes with stinky finger. Life is not real, it's just an illusion. Items marked with a * were taken from |